Proverbs 29:18 King James Version (KJV)
18 Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.
I was surprised to learn that when given a choice between being blind or deaf many people would rather see and accept losing their hearing. I thought of the difficulty of losing the sweet sound of music and the voice of my family telling me how much they love me. Especially my children, their voices have a way of unlocking and releasing the frustrations life can encapsulate, like a soda bottle shaken to the extreme. In proverbs it’s clear that without vision people will perish, in other words without site how would we navigate through life. So why do we waste time with people that cloud the very nature of all that God has for us? I want to provide some filters that will help you navigate through toxic relationships in order to keep your eyes clear of the oncoming traffic of life and avoid the pitfalls that stunt our growth.
Learn to run your own race and avoid making decisions based on superficial things. The most successful runners are the ones that keep their eyes on the finish line. Many races have been lost by a fraction of a second just because the runner looked back and compared their position to someone else. Learn to be content in your lane and run it to the best of your ability. The race of life should be filled with moments of value and caring for one another. Live a life of meaning with the passion and gifts God has given you. Your race is distinct from anybody else; don’t waste valuable time comparing. “I read an interesting report from a nurse who takes care of people close to death. She asked hundreds of patients facing death what their biggest regrets were. The number one regret was they wish they had been true to themselves and not lived to meet the expectations of others.”(1)
Be the original you were created to be. I once heard it said, “all are born originals but many die as copies.” The most original painting poses the greatest value, so why not live like one. We have been created as God’s original masterpiece but choose to discard who we are and live as a forged painting with lesser value. When we unlock our true value and what we were created to be, joy rises to the surface and wholeness is achieved. You will never a find a relationship either in friendship or marriage that will complete you. Relationships can complement you but God is the only one that can complete you. In Jeremiah 29:11, God shares with the people of Israel as he prepares to free them from bondage, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” This word stands true today! God has a specific plan to prosper you. While others may choose to harm you, God wants to protect you and prosper you in all areas of your life. In order for you to avoid vision killers you have to refocus and remind yourself of the specific plan God has given you and your value.
Choose to receive praise from God rather than men. I have learned over time just as long as you satisfy the agenda of men and their desires, you will always receive praise. As an Eagles football fan, I have heard the rumors of the type of fans that derive from the City of Brotherly Love. As long as the Eagles win you will always hear the praises and adulation for the team, but as the pendulum sways to the favor of the opposition; Philly fans are quick to let you have it. If we are honest isn’t this the worlds expectation? It’s all about performance in order to receive praise but God’s has chosen a different path. In John 3:16, His love was given to us without merit. He chose to love us first before we could love Him. His love operates differently than the world’s love. His love is not performance based but a gift granted through the death of His son for us. Transformational love can only take place when we are able to embrace and accept His love. When you live a life expecting to receive praise from men, it’s like drawing water from an empty well. If you continue to make the trip to the same well, you will eventually die of thirst. Don’t live a life of dehydration when the living well is in front of you which will never run dry. Jesus said in John 7:37,38 “Anyone who is thirsty may come to me! 38 Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’”[a]
Vision killers will never run their own race. They will choose to run yours so learn to stay in your lane while fixing your eyes on the finish line. Live as an original masterpiece accepting your true value which is God given. Resist being a carbon copy of anyone else. Tune your ears to the praises of God and not of men which are fleeting. Don’t be afraid to chase your dreams and passions, because when your vision is clear, the journey will feel much shorter. Every step you take will be easier with the vision killers vanquished.